Every morning I listened to the next lesson from Dan Roberts, taking extensive notes.

Nuggets from Lesson 2

Babies have five core development needs:

1. Love and a secure attachment.
2. Safety and protection.
3. Being valued as a unique human being. (“I don’t love you because of X, I love you because you’re my child and you’re wonderful just as you are.”)
4. Being allowed to play and express feelings spontaneously.
5. Being taught boundaries and right from wrong.

Those first four were unreliable for me. As for the fifth, I was taught boundaries I couldn’t cross, lines that held consequences. But personal boundaries? As a colleague once asked,

“Jule, what do your boundaries look like?”

“What are boundaries?”

“Exactly.”

As for Robert’s five core developmental needs, I think he missed one:

6. Compassionate touch*

Human babies are born too early. It’s because our heads are so big. If we stayed in utero, our heads would be too big to fit through the birth canal. So we come out early, not walking a few hours later (like many mammals), but limp, helpless.

In such a vulnerable condition, we are attuned to the implications of every touch (or lack thereof).

*See Touching: The Human Significance of the Skin, by Ashley Montagu

Chewing the Cud of Good

Thankful for skin.