Here we go.

The Human Compass and the Hand are two models that have helped me live my life in a way that feels good, that seems better than it was before. This week I’ll focus on the Human Compass; we’ll get to the Hand in a future piece.

Did I tell you I’m happy?

It hasn’t been a common feeling for me. Anxiety, yes. Calm happiness, no. I believe the Human Compass and the Hand have helped me get there.

We’ll get into both models, followed by how I make them come alive in my life so they don’t gather dust and become trash instead of treasure.

As always, this has proved useful to me, but your mileage may vary. Take what’s useful, leave the rest.

The Human Compass

The Human Compass is a lot like a traditional compass. It tells you which direction you’re headed so you can decide if you want to end up there or change course.

Whether you’re in a boat or hiking the Boundary Waters Canoe Area (the Olympics are making me miss it), your compass points to magnetic north because the needle is magnetized.

For our purposes here, north doesn’t move around. The North Pole doesn’t suddenly decide to relocate to Albuquerque.

So, too, with the Human Compass. It points to your true north. However, there’s a difference between the two. With a traditional compass, north is the same for everyone. The Human Compass is unique to each individual because north is determined by each person’s values.

I’ve had different values over the course of my life, but about 20 years ago I narrowed it down to two: love + truth.

Those two values are my true north. When I’m lost, confused, or wanting reassurance, I can check my compass.

Is eating a family-size bag of Doritos in one day loving and truthful? No. It’s not loving toward my body and no, because it’s avoiding the truth of whatever is making me want to self-soothe with food.

Is taking Roxie out for a walk loving and truthful? Yes, because Roxie and I both enjoy our walks, and the truth is, if we don’t go out, I’ll have a mess to clean up.

I write love + truth in lowercase to acknowledge that I may not always be right about what’s loving and truthful. (Life is complicated.) Most of the time, love + truth reliably point me in the right direction.

I hope you know what your values are, because your compass needs them, and you need your compass (or at least that’s the point I’d like to make).

If you’re not sure what your values are, don’t panic. You can do a values clarification exercise. Or you can ask people who know you well what they see as your values. Expect that you’ll refine your values as you live with them.

However you go about it, keep your list short. Brené Brown says you can’t have more than two. She’ll let you slide with three, but more than that become wallpaper—aspirational rather than action-oriented.

Next week, on to the rest of the Human Compass!

Chewing the Cud of Good

Thankful for the people who gave me feedback on something—it’s helping me make it better.