Latest Reflections

Winter Solstice

Winter Solstice

Thank you. My mom's dementia. The bag lady (again). Roxie. 400 cookies. Inherited family trauma. Internal Family Systems. A name in stone. Thank you for being here, for all of it. My fingers...

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All My Relations

All My Relations

When I walk Roxie, if I am feeling lonely (it happens), I—silently—remind myself of all my relations, and I greet them. “Hello, tree! We are relations!” To the gray river behind the trees, “Hello,...

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Grief and Relief Can Coexist

Grief and Relief Can Coexist

Even though grief is a cold ocean and relief a warm sigh, they can both be in my chest at the same time. I can grieve what my mother is losing, what we are losing, while I am glad to be home,...

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I’m not lying in a ditch somewhere

I’m not lying in a ditch somewhere

Last Sunday I figured you'd figure I was taking a day off. Today, I didn't even realize it was Sunday until somewhere on I-70 in western Pennsylvania. This is what happens when I visit my mom. I...

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And what if…?

And what if…?

What if the fear of becoming a bag lady has nothing to do with bag ladies but is something I've conjured to keep myself working hard, still, still, still, cycling back to a need to prove myself...

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Welcoming the Uninvited Guest

Welcoming the Uninvited Guest

She shows up dirty, raggedy. Comes close, smells a foul taste, whispers in both my ears at once. “You don’t have enough. You’re going to run out.” Her words land as a cold stone in my stomach. I...

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Got enough love?

When my husband died and other changes followed, The Love Bucket helped me figure out how to bring more love into my life. If you’d like an objective method to increase the level of love in your life, this guide is for you!

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Jule Kucera